Sociologists from University of Michigan analyzed the online dating site messaging habits of more than , heterosexual people from four US cities: New York, Boston, Chicago, and Seattle. And, stranger still, that was the one group for whom the effort yielded the desired results. The researchers also found that women tended to send more positive messages to more desirable men, whereas men sent less positive messages to women who were more desirable than them.

Too high, in many cases. According to the researchers, the bigger the gap in desirability between two people, the less likely the receiver is to reply.

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Struggling to think of the right thing to say to an attractive match? This is basic, but sometimes daters forget that the first thing a match will do when they receive an interesting message is click on the profile of the person who sent it. For more advice, check out our top tips for writing your online dating profile. Just aim for something pithy and personalised. If your match mentions loving a specific film, use a quote from it as your subject.

If they love a certain stand-up comic, use the beginning of one of their jokes you know. Research has shown that people warm towards hearing their own name in conversation. Make it sweet and fun. Instead, start by saying what caught your eye about their profile. If their profile made you laugh out loud in the middle of Tesco, say it. If you despaired of ever meeting a woman who loved football even if you question her choice of team , say it. The easiest way to start a conversation with anyone new is to ask a question, so include one.

Tailor it to their interests or their work, or even one of their photos. A good first message is sweet, and short.